Default Settings

Learning from the hardest lessons

Tamyara Brown
4 min readJun 4, 2019

Being aware of your fear is smart. Overcoming it is the mark of a successful person.-Seth Godin

I have been in the greatest training season of my life. 2019 has taught me about how often I second guess myself, how I tolerate the things that hurt me and the Tamyara who lives in fear but wants to step out and be found. Yet, there is a default setting that reminds me that I have talent but I don’t look or act like others. We all have a default setting that takes us down a notch when we want to live in our greatness. It is then I allow those words that creep in and send me back to the insecurities that have plagued and imprisoned my greatness. It is the moments that I have to take the lessons defined to break me and allow it to make me over in greatness.

Lately, I’ve wanted to revert back to my default settings and lock down my heart. It hit me just yesterday that the lessons were happening for a reason. My eyes were open because I deserve to see the light at the end of the tunnel but also some hard truths we fear about ourselves and others.

It Was Meant to Mold You

Each lesson has taught me about who I am. I am talking the shattered girl, the hurt teenager and lastly the broken adult. Most of my life I accepted the terms and conditions of those words live by the mess and not the beautiful masterpiece. I live by the words of others who spoke of what I couldn’t be and even in my best I ran to the default settings. I thought every lesson was meant to break me, but the more I look at myself it was to mold me to be a brand new me. I’ve been chosen to set the standard of how the hard lessons made me work harder, become more creative and even in my trials none of them have held me back.

Yes, it is easier to quit and give up because it is my default settings. The truth is every time I go back to factory reset I begin again. I restart but I never finish. The times I let folks do what they do to keep me beneath them. I came to a realization each time they thought they broke me it molded me into perseverance. The people who chuckle and whispered about me taught me to keep going regardless of whatever. I had to recognize who I am not and not claim…

Tamyara Brown

Tamyara is an author of eight novels, blogger, graphic and website designer. She is also the host of B.L.A.H Diaries.